She said: Sarah, for a while, my husband fell ill, and at the same time, I also fell ill from feeling sad for him.
It was at this point that I decided to stand up to help myself manage my sadness and my belief now
I found that I was attached to my husband in a sick way and I do not imagine, if for just a moment, that I could lose him. The situation is not easy for me until I reached this firm belief “I do not accept the idea of losing him.”
How could Sarah help herself?
Imagine if you were in this situation, what would you do?
Through my experience in emotional intelligence and helping hundreds of people manage their feelings through coaching or coaching, I asked Sarah to replace this belief with a new one.
Sarah put forward a set of ideas until she finally chose a comfortable belief for her
She said: I was sure that the solution to many problems is that the heart is attached to God alone, and if it is attached to anyone else here, the torment will be the same, and since this time I feel a change in my life.
Sarah affirms that every person has the right to feel anger, sadness, anxiety and fear for the one he loves, because these are natural feelings such as feelings of joy, happiness and love. I reassure myself, I say that my husband will be in good health and he will be relieved, God willing, and in fact his condition was improving and I feel great kindness from God Almighty, praise be to God. My husband fell ill from a kind of serious illness, yet I was feeling so strong that he did not know the nature of the medicines he was taking and I understood him when he asked me about his condition Why is he taking all these medicines? I held together and explained to him that these medicines are simple, even though they contain a chemical part.
Sarah’s message that reflects and expresses her emotional intelligence and her ability to manage her feelings ended in this difficult situation.
I want to share the lessons of this story with you and what we need to learn in order to reach this level of emotional management, especially in a time of high emotion.
5 tips and steps to help you manage your feelings.
1- One of the signs of emotional intelligence is that you have self-awareness to know how you feel. For example, Sarah was feeling sad because of her husband’s illness.
2- The higher the level of self-awareness, the greater your ability to understand and perceive the effect of what you feel on you. One of the thanks of this effect, which I mean is what Sarah expressed when she said I felt a contraction in the heart muscle. This is a physiological effect, and by the way, every feeling has a different effect on the body.
There is also a behavioral effect and it appeared in her behavior when she decided to make a stand with herself.
The third effect, the cognitive effect, was expressed when she realized the belief that caused everything she was feeling: not accepting the loss of her husband.
3- It is good to accept your feeling, that is, if this feeling is, your acceptance of what you feel helps you deal with it, because some people reject their feelings and this makes it difficult for them to manage their feelings.
4- Managing feeling does not mean the absence of this feeling, but rather the presence of feeling and learning new ways that help us behave in a way that does not affect us and our decisions, and enables us to control behavior.
5- Ask yourself, after managing your feelings, what did you benefit from this situation, and what is the message carried by this feeling, if you do that, you will double the learning process and benefit.
